Those That Can't Be Trusted

I dedicate this post to my good friend, Ashley.

For years a couple of friends and I have been discussing a sort of conspiracy theory. The theory is this: people who don't like to eat can't be trusted. As far as I know there is no "real" scientific data to back this up, though nonetheless it became a hard fact for us. Now, this may seem irrational, but once examined its absoluteness is undeniable. In fact, we have studied and debated this theory so closely that is has become an indisputable rule for our circle of friends.

People who don't enjoy food deny themselves of one of the most basic human pleasures. Although like all things that are pleasurable there is a fine line between hedonism and balance. To find food and eating as a task is also to shelter oneself from culture and engage with others. Food is an art, food makes communities, and finally food is a significant glimpse into other's culture and way of life.

On New Year's Day, a friend from Eritrea (for those not familiar, Eritrea is a country in Africa next to Ethiopia) made for a small group of my friends and I a traditional Eritrean/Ethiopian lunch. It was her way of showing us her love and sharing with us her home. She made different lentil dishes, a beef-type stew, all served with injera. Injera is according to wikipedia: "a large sourdough flatbread, which is about 50 centimeters (20 inches) in diameter and made out of fermented teff flour. Ethiopians eat with their right hands, using pieces of injera to pick up bites of entrées and side dishes. No utensils are used." The meal was delicious and I am lucky to have a caring friend who took the time to expand my mind and desire to know more about the world.

To have denied this wonderfully prepared meal on the basis that food is a task and should be kept to its bear minimum, would have been to reject my friend, and more so refuse to open myself up to a deeper multi-cultural understanding. By stubbornly abiding to such pretenses one thereby refuses to learn, and those who refuse to learn or understand others absolutely cannot be trusted. These kind of people will always choose themselves and their convictions over yours, and you will be always be a second thought to them--I really don't believe a true friendship can last on such a frame-work.

Enough with my ranting, but to my readers, take a moment and consider the people in your life, and think about what I have just written. I am curious to see if this theory is as valid as I am convinced it is.

Narcissistically yours,

D.

Jewish Christmas 2010: A Definite Victory

There are certain times of year where, as a Jew (and please forgive me for speaking on behalf of the entire Jewish community) we feel more like outsiders than other times, and Christmas just happens to be the pinnacle of this frustration. Over the years, as Christmas developed into a commercial success, Jews have found different ways to cope with this cultural isolation. For instance, we wrote Christmas songs, which topped the charts such as, "White Christmas" by Irving Berlin, who was originally Izzy Baline, and "Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow" by Sammy Cahn and Jule Styne. Once those catching jingles didn't seem to quite console us like we intended them to, we searched to create our very own festive winter celebration. Conveniently, Hanukkah, the festival of lights, just so happened to take place close to Christmas. Hanukkah was never a holiday of significance, in fact it's not even in the Torah, but luckily for us there was enough gimmicky traits to turn it into what we hoped would be the Jewish answer to Christmas. Alas, Hanukkah, despite all our exploited attempts fell short of the euphoric joy Christmas brings the gentiles. So what was a modern Jew to do? Well, Jewish Christmas of course!

The concept of Jewish Christmas is simple: Chinese delivery and a movie, either at the theaters or at home. Why? Because Chinese restaurants are the only places that will deliver on Christmas, and the movies are a great make-believe consolidation. We can pretend it's not Christmas, rather some other mundane day, which we all, regardless of our religious heritage can enjoy.

This year King Fu in West Los Angeles catered to our (me and my two other wandering Jewish friends) fickle Yiddish needs. When one orders Chinese food not much is expected, except the promise of greasy mysterious food, which will surely add to our high cholesterol and make our doctors "oy" and "vey" in protest. King Fu is speedy, fairly cheap, and surprisingly good in more than just a "I can feel the MSG pumping through my arteries" kind of way. We ordered, with the intention to share: the assorted appetizers, moo shu pork, due to the fact that we were feeling slightly more blasphemous than usual, eggplant with szechuan, which was a disappointment and not my choice, and finally moo goo gai pan, because we didn't know what it was.

Once our gastronomical desires were met, a few others joined us for the second portion of the evening: beer and watching Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. Out of the six of us two were not Jews--a huge victory on behalf of Jewish Christmas. We had achieved, what we believed was impossible, the non-Jews actually wanting to attend our Jewish Christmas celebration, instead of the traditional one--it was truly a Christmas miracle. I think I can safely say that we as Jews are finally on to something a bit more fulfilling (pun intended) than kitschy tunes and spinning dreidels.

Happy Holidays!

Narcissistically yours,

D.